This piece is part of my 2016–2026 archive migration. Some original formatting, content, and external links may be missing, changed, or not be optimized.
Which of the two is most important to you?
Another guy told the woman he loved to please tell him to leave his wife because he was too scared to make the decisions on his own accord. She didn’t tell him to do a thing.
I’m no marriage expert, but staying in a dead-end marriage because it’s convenient or you’re too scared to leave doesn’t sound like the best option.
Divorce
Do it for your happiness and also for your kids. Because staying in a dead-end, toxic, and unhealthy relationship teaches your kids to do the same at their own expense (i.e., mental, emotional, physical, and spiritual health).
I often observe people who stay in unhealthy marriages because of finances or the kids. There are instances where staying married does make the most sense, or things could get really messy.
Unfortunately, being an adult does not automatically make you mature, and people often use kids as weapons with their ex.
In other cases, people believe they should stay married so they can hold it all together for the kids. I’m unsure who developed this wretched lie, but that’s all.
In many cases, people forget about their needs. If you value and love yourself enough, you’ll find a way to leave and make everything else work.
My parents were married for 26 years. Getting a divorce was the best thing for them, and they taught me that you can maintain a healthy relationship with your ex-partner without all the drama. Doing so takes maturity, love, patience, and respect; I’m thankful my parents showed me this.
Someone recently told me my parents did it the best way because they stayed married for 26 years. I introduced a different perspective and told them no, they should have separated a lot earlier because it taught my siblings and me to settle and be passive in our own relationships if they weren’t for the best. Moreover, they sacrificed years of their own happiness to the extent of us. I’ll never be that kid that wants their parents to stay together at the expense of their happiness. That’s selfish. At the end of the day, we have to see our parents as adults and their own individual beings – something that is hard to do for many kids; I was able to grasp the concept early, but I know this can be foreign for many kids.
I get it, there is no love like parents have for their children, but as a kid, I wish my parents had got a divorce sooner, so they could have experience happiness for a longer duration.
Staying married isn’t strong or respectable if it doesn’t make sense emotionally, mentally, and spiritually.
This content is for informational purposes only — not professional advice. Consult a qualified professional before making any major decisions.