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An Old Dating Partner Asked Me To Move In: No Thanks
Financial independence makes you think twice
One of the biggest reasons couples do this is to save money and get that 50% discount.
There’s nothing wrong with saving money, but at what cost will you be saving money? What will you give up in return? For some people, it’s their freedom, peace of mind, space, and autonomy.
I have a friend right now who moved in with their partner. But now they’re financially dependent on one another. One can’t live without the other financially. Even though one party wants to move out independently, they’re stuck until they become financially dependent again.
I’m not saying that moving in with a partner makes you lazy, but it can make you financially comfortable and willing to not make as much progress on your financial goals as you might if you were living alone.
An old dating partner asked me to move in with them, and I declined multiple times. Here’s why:
Their space was smaller than mine.
I didn’t want to live with them full-time.
I wasn’t desperate to save 50% on housing like they were.
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Here’s how I knew they were desperate for a 50% discount. After I declined multiple times, they finally got another friend to move in and pay 50% of the rent. They were a little too excited.
But the funny thing about that is the roommate backed out, so they were stuck with a full load of rent anyway.
Could they afford it? Based on what they shared about their finances, they could, but I wondered why they were so desperate for a roommate if their finances were healthy.
When you are financially stable, you make less unwise choices with money:
You don’t move in just because the opportunity arises.
You weigh the pros and cons of all decisions that could impact your finances.
You don’t give up your income because your partner cares for everything.
What if I needed that 50% discount or a place to stay because I couldn’t obtain my own? I might be in an unhealthy relationship and stuck living with the person.
Some people I know today are living with partners or roommates that are not healthy to be around, but they have no choice but to be since they are not financially independent.
Always Ask These Questions Before Moving In
If you haven’t already moved in with your partner, hold off on doing so before reviewing the running list of questions below:
Do I need my partner’s income?
Am I financially strong on my own?
Do I have an emergency fund in place?
Am I on track with my savings and investment goals?
How does my partner handle their finances?
Does this person have a positive or negative net worth?
How much debt does my partner currently have?
If my partner has debt, what is their debt repayment plan?
Does my partner invest?
What income percentage does my partner save/invest each month?
What are my partner’s financial goals?
How much does my partner earn?
Does my partner need my income?
Why does my partner want to move in with me outside of the emotional aspect?
How well do I know my partner?
What is my partner’s philosophy about money?
Is my partner financially self-sufficient?
What are the spending habits of my partner?
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This content is for informational purposes only — not professional advice. Consult a qualified professional before making any major decisions.
This content is for informational purposes only — not professional advice. Consult a qualified professional before making any major decisions.