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Whoops, she thought wrong, and he broke off the engagement
Of Course, He’ll Pay For My Debts!
Happily engaged, these two were. And the wedding was only getting closer.
But not all engagements have happy endings.
A woman put down her fiance as a reference for some of her credit accounts.
There are multiple problems with this situation.
Outside of not seeking permission and initiating a discussion beforehand with her fiance, she was up to her knees with debt.
She was so deep in debt that the creditors eventually called her fiance (just in time before they officially tied the knot) to learn if he could help cover the debt.
Her fiance quickly broke off the engagement.
I once had a partner who thought I would pay for things, too, as if their financial situation and bad habits were somehow my responsibility.
That’s not how it works – at least not in my book.
Stop Seeking Financial Saviors
Women seeking financial saviors in their partners, boy, do I have a word for you:
Stop doing this.
Save yourself.
Save your finances.
Be independent.
There is nothing positive or attractive about being financially dependent on someone else, which also prevents you from having options.
Too many women are stuck in financially dependent relationships with partners they don’t need to be with.
The more you financially rely on others, the less freedom you have.
Some of the questions I prioritize asking every person I involve myself with revolve around personal finance.
I don’t even casually date people if their finances are f*cked because it completely misaligns my values.
12 Lessons Learned From This Situation
Debt is not anyone’s problem but yours.
If you can’t pay cash after 30 days, leave the purchase.
Don’t rely on a partner to erase your financial mistakes.
If someone needs to be a better financial match, walk away.
Don’t try to use people to bail you out of fiscal irresponsibility.
Don’t rely on a partner to financially support you; support yourself.
Don’t use credit cards if you quickly rack up debt; avoid them altogether.
Masked financial problems don’t get better in relationships; they get worse.
Nothing is okay about hiding financial problems from your partner or future partner.
Your finances are only as good as your partner’s financial habits. Choose your partner wisely.
Eventually, you have to face the music with your financial choices. It’s better to face them alone than have someone tell you that you need to face them; it’s also less embarrassing.
Don’t expect others to excuse or ignore your bad financial habits – especially if they have a healthy and responsible relationship with money. Get your financial sh*t together.
This content is for informational purposes only — not professional advice. Consult a qualified professional before making any major decisions.
This content is for informational purposes only — not professional advice. Consult a qualified professional before making any major decisions.