This piece is part of my 2016–2026 archive migration. Some original formatting, content, and external links may be missing, changed, or not be optimized.
Have your own
Another woman told me she found her partner was cheating on her. Ultimately, her partner kicked her out of their house, and she became homeless. She didn’t have enough to get her own place. Thankfully, a friend saved the day and offered her temporary housing. What a lesson, though. She vowed to never be in that position again. She would always have her own, and to this day, she does.
Another woman stayed in a relationship longer than she should have because she was obsessed with saving money. Though the relationship was toxic, unhealthy, and filled with dissatisfaction and unhappiness, she stayed. And one of the biggest reasons was to save as much money as possible. She did accomplish this, but in return, she delayed her happiness. Was it worth it?
One guy stayed with women that were toxic but offered financial support. Because he didn’t have his own, he became reliant on his partners, which placed him in compromising positions with unhealthy women.
These scenarios exhibit an unhealthy relationship with money and an unhealthy reason to stay in their relationships.
Money Is A Big Deal In Relationships
Money is one of the biggest (if not the biggest) causes of conflict in relationships. When you don’t have it, it’s a problem. When you do have it, it’s still a problem. The way both parties spend the money is also often a problem – especially if both parties have different spending, saving, and investing methods.
When you have your own resources, you can freely choose your partners based on your financial values. If you are responsible with money, I highly encourage you to choose partners who are the same, or it will cause strife within the relationship.
A Few Closing Tips
If you’re not financially independent or can’t afford your current lifestyle without your partner’s assistance, it’s time you get your finances in order. Set things in motion to set yourself up for financial independence – whatever that looks like.
Ensure you have your own emergency fund, separate from your partner.
Maintain your own investments in your name.
Have your own income source outside your partner – even if your partner is the breadwinner.
Utilize joint and separate bank accounts.
Don’t share all finances. It’s okay to keep things separated.
If you share any accounts with your partner, always keep an eye on them so you always have 100% transparency into your finances. Shared finances are still yours. You owe it to yourself to keep an eye on everything.
This content is for informational purposes only — not professional advice. Consult a qualified professional before making any major decisions.