This piece is part of my 2016–2026 archive migration. Some original formatting, content, and external links may be missing, changed, or not be optimized.
White privilege is attractive
The […] Negro who wants to be white will be whiter as he gains greater mastery of the cultural tool that language is…The fact of having to speak nothing but the other’s language when the other was the conqueror, ruler, and oppressor was at once an affirmation of him, his worldview, and his values; a concession to his framework; an estrangement from one’s history, values and outlook.” – Frantz Fanon, In Black Skin, White Masks
Communication
More on the quote above, my step-grandfather told me at a young age that I sound and communicate like a white person.
Why do we stereotype black people into sounding and talking the same? Can we not have diversity in our voices and communication styles without it being compared to white people?
We frequently box people in to fit our perceptions and beliefs, so we can feel more comfortable and secure about the world around us.
Deviation is the enemy.
People have also said, “You use white people’s words. I don’t understand what you’re saying. Talk normal.”
Many have told me that I don’t sound like a black woman or that my voice is surprising, and they weren’t expecting it to sound like that.
Some people might take these words as a compliment because they aspire to assimilate the white standard as much as possible.
When white is the ideal, assimilation versus deviation is more attractive.
Housing
Growing up, the best neighborhoods were called “The White Neighborhoods.”
The worst neighborhoods were usually the “All Black” neighborhoods.
These statements are still mostly facts today.
And when neighborhoods became “too black,” people started moving out – mainly white people.
The neighborhood I grew up in was predominantly white. As it became more diverse, the white people started moving out.
Money
The millionaires and billionaires who lived in the building my father worked in were primarily white.
I WAS FASCINATED when I saw a black person with money because I wasn’t used to seeing it.
Black people constantly tried to get money, struggled, or complained about money. And many weren’t living the lifestyles I noticed many white people were living.
Some more thoughts I had and saw evidence of as a kid:
White people had more money.
Black people had less money.
If you’re getting value from this — sign up for my newsletter, a free daily 5 AM email. Discipline delivered before the sun comes up.
Success Looked White
From a very early age, I desired to be white. Though I didn’t understand or know the concept of “white privilege,” I could recognize its benefits at a young age.
Many of them seemed better off than people of color, and they were.
From the outside looking in, they had better lunches; they had better education; they had better opportunities; they had better homes; they had better financial circumstances; they had better vacations; they had better friends; they had better families (they knew who their extended family was); they seemed to have overall better lives and access to everything better.
Once I became educated, financially independent, and fell in love with who I am, I no longer had the desire to be white.
A person doesn’t need to be white to experience a better life; we see this daily. Though white people are still dominating the world economically and politically, it doesn’t mean you don’t have the chance to do so yourself.
Do you wish you were white?
A Black flight attendant gave the white male better service
This content is for informational purposes only — not professional advice. Consult a qualified professional before making any major decisions.