This piece is part of my 2016–2026 archive migration. Some original formatting, content, and external links may be missing, changed, or not be optimized.
Couples often can’t afford their lifestyles without their partner
Not everyone is fortunate enough to handle their mortgage without a partner or roommate, which is why many mortgages or rental applications have more than one applicant – leading many of us to believe we can afford more house than we actually can and live above our individual means.
Relationships can be trickier when you involve real estate. No relationship is a guarantee – even if you’re 99.99% sure. Sometimes, things don’t work out.
We are all familiar with the 50% divorce/separation rate. Though this statistic doesn’t mean our relationships will end in separation, we should always be prepared to stand on our feet financially.
It might seem unusual to buy or rent a house on a budget that fits both partners’ individual financial limits, but this is the most intelligent way to buy. If you shop for your homes with this mentality, you’ll never be surprised with a rent/mortgage bill you can’t handle in the case your partner is unable to pull their weight.
Many people live with their partners not only because it makes more financial sense but because they can’t afford not to live with their partners. Bringing two incomes to the table makes things easier financially, eases the expense burden, and entices many to live above their means since many treat their partner’s income as their income.
Most people don’t ever ask themselves these two questions:
Can I afford to live here if I didn’t have my partner contributing to the bills?
Can I afford my current lifestyle if I didn’t have my partner’s financial resources?
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Often, the answer to these questions is no.
If you’ve found yourself to be living above your individual means, here are some actions you can take:
Decrease your debts.
Increase your income.
Downsize your residence.
Decrease your cost of living (expenses).
Stop relying so heavily on your partner’s income.
Save and invest not only for retirement but for a rainy day.
Determine the lifestyle you can afford without your partner’s money.
At the end of the day, your partner’s income is not your income. Yes, it is shared income, but your partner’s paychecks are in their name, not yours, which means you need to always ensure your money is right.
This conversation is not cynical but prudent. Separation isn’t the only thing that financially impacts our money; sometimes, partners die, become diversely abled, or lose income. Whatever the case, manage your financial resources responsibly so you’re always prepared.
This content is for informational purposes only — not professional advice. Consult a qualified professional before making any major decisions.