This piece is part of my 2016–2026 archive migration. Some original formatting, content, and external links may be missing, changed, or not be optimized.
It’s time for you to change your approach immediately
Too many women remain in relationships they need to exit because they don’t have the means to go elsewhere; they are stuck.
Money is not the answer to all problems, but it is healthy to have your own financial resources – even in a marriage. I’m not a pessimist; I just realize things can change at any moment – without notice – even when you’re planning for forever with your special someone.
I’ve seen financially dependent women kicked out of their homes multiple times because their partner or roommate didn’t want to live with them anymore. I’ve also seen financially dependent women move in with their partners because they couldn’t afford to live independently.
If you can’t afford to live on your own, I challenge you to change that – immediately.
One way you can stay in control of your life is by taking control of your finances. When you’re financially dependent on someone, you’re not in charge of your life anymore; they are. If you share the financial burden with someone, you two are financially codependent on one another, which is also dangerous.
My partner got upset with me when I moved out of state for my first job out of college, but I told them, “I have to ensure I am financially independent.” That was my number one priority. I knew that I would always do everything I could to ensure that I call my shots and never financially depend on someone if I could help it.
It’s nice when your partner, friend, or family is willing to help you out when you’re down and out. Still, it’s also dangerous because it can prevent you from becoming financially independent and instead be a reason for becoming financially reliant on someone else, which can be debilitating.
Grown kids who continue living with their parents or keep moving back show they’re financially irresponsible. And the parents are enabling them to continue being financially irresponsible and dependent on them.
For those looking for a quick win (marrying into money), think again. Sometimes it works out, but often you have to put up with a lot of bullsh*t that you wouldn’t have to if you had your own resources.
People have previously told me I belong with someone wealthy, and I often respond, I don’t care about that. As long as I can take care of myself, that’s what matters. I also want to ensure that whoever I’m with is financially sound.
It’s much more important to be in a relationship where both parties are financially independent. I could never be a golddigger because I value my financial independence way too much. I recommend all women aim to be financially independent; it’s one way to take control of their present and future life.
This content is for informational purposes only — not professional advice. Consult a qualified professional before making any major decisions.
This content is for informational purposes only — not professional advice. Consult a qualified professional before making any major decisions.